A little guilt trip
It's 9am on monday morning, I just kissed my partner goodbye on his way to work, and I have a lot to get done, in not a lot of time. My problematically sexy friend just called to say he is on his way here in a couple of hours, and nudity will no doubt ensue. At least I managed to warn my partner that he was likely to be in town, and I'd be out with him for a bit, and he seemed ok, rather than "when are you going to get any work done?" so not too bad on the guilt front.
(Yes, I do feel guilt occasionally, but it is almost always to do with when/where rather than what i'm doing - my love may be happy with my seeing other people, but he'd rather I got my work done first!)
I did catch Cad online last night, and tried quite hard to cancel, thinking about all the ethical issues, and the amount of work I have to do. It really bothers me that he's lying to his girlfriend about why he's coming to see me, but in the end the desire for some damn good fun won out, and the fact that we won't be having penetrative sex, as that's in the agreements I have with my partner, also makes it seem less wrong.
In the end, what convinced me was the little voice in my head saying 'this is your youth, the time to mis-spend it is now'. I have been living for the last few months by the motto 'regret what you have done, not what you have not done', and I guess this comes under the category, even if I might be regretting it before I even start.
Hopefully we will find a good location outdoors and get in a photoset for the photographic project I have ongoing, then I will feel less bad about being distracted from my other work.
Off walking in the countryside with a different friend tomorrow, though, and if the weather stays like it is right now, it should be glorious.
Right, I'd better go and hop in the bath and then try and get something useful done before Cad arrives, otherwise I will feel dreadful.
x
(Yes, I do feel guilt occasionally, but it is almost always to do with when/where rather than what i'm doing - my love may be happy with my seeing other people, but he'd rather I got my work done first!)
I did catch Cad online last night, and tried quite hard to cancel, thinking about all the ethical issues, and the amount of work I have to do. It really bothers me that he's lying to his girlfriend about why he's coming to see me, but in the end the desire for some damn good fun won out, and the fact that we won't be having penetrative sex, as that's in the agreements I have with my partner, also makes it seem less wrong.
In the end, what convinced me was the little voice in my head saying 'this is your youth, the time to mis-spend it is now'. I have been living for the last few months by the motto 'regret what you have done, not what you have not done', and I guess this comes under the category, even if I might be regretting it before I even start.
Hopefully we will find a good location outdoors and get in a photoset for the photographic project I have ongoing, then I will feel less bad about being distracted from my other work.
Off walking in the countryside with a different friend tomorrow, though, and if the weather stays like it is right now, it should be glorious.
Right, I'd better go and hop in the bath and then try and get something useful done before Cad arrives, otherwise I will feel dreadful.
x
posted by Miss Scarlet at 8:57 am
2 Comments:
I'm already confused... so many letters of the alphabet, and so little time. I'm intrigued by your agreement not to have penetrative sex, though, and am kind of imaginating the conversation that took place. For some reason it's amusing me.
I haven't even introduced L, D, W and S yet!
I might go back and talk about things like how I got to where I am later this week, when there's less going on. Thanks for reading, and I hope you still find it interesting!
x
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